


Coalescence

by LilliaLuna



Category: AI: The Somnium Files (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, F/M, I legitimately have no idea how to tag this, I never thought I'd be the first one to write Datomi smut but here we are, Sexual Content, but very tame, featuring Kaname Date's identity crisis, i guess?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-12 09:48:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29882742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilliaLuna/pseuds/LilliaLuna
Summary: “But you know better than anyone that’s not true.” He looked straight into her eyes. “So remind me of who I am.”Hitomi’s in a rare mood, so he asks a bold question. Her answer is the last thing he was expecting.But maybe, just maybe, it’s what they both needed to hear.
Relationships: Date Kaname/Sagan Hitomi
Comments: 1
Kudos: 7





	Coalescence

Hitomi had never been particularly interested in sex.

Sure, she was physically affectionate. Mizuki and Iris knew better than anyone that she loved to give cuddles and kisses and hugs. And in her loneliest moments, she’d wished she had someone who could give them back to her. But sex? She liked it well enough in fiction - she did enjoy a good romance plot - but the details usually bored her. The thought of being involved in it herself had rarely crossed her mind.

She’d dated in high school, but she’d never gone that far. In college, she had been convinced, twice, but she hadn’t enjoyed it either time. After that, she cut her losses. She hadn’t cared too much about those relationships anyways. And once she had Iris, she had an even better excuse.

Then along came him.

Twelve long, tiring, wonderful years later, along came _him_.

She loved him. She loved him with everything she had. She was stupid, she wasn’t thinking - but she was in love.

And finally, with him, she had enjoyed it. Because she’d felt he loved her too.

He was her third. Her fourth. Her fifth. She’d stopped counting. With him, she didn’t regret anything.

He’d been taken from her, and so had her arm. She’d been heartbroken. She’d never let him go. It wasn’t right, she knew, but she didn’t move on. She couldn’t.

Six years and an identity change later, he had found himself back in her life. And now, judging by the ring on her finger, he hadn’t been able to move on either.

In her mind, he was her only. He always would be.

Hitomi may not have been particularly interested in sex, but she was completely smitten with him.

And he made it _good_.

She blinked. The two of them were sitting on the couch, watching the credits of their movie scroll by. It hadn't been particularly good, but that one line stuck in her brain, and it was making her think in a way that was so unlike her. Not even the scene itself, as pertinent to her train of thought as it was, but just that one line…

Heh. She shook her head and stood up. She needed to go to sleep. Kaname looked at her. “I’m going to get ready for bed,” she said.

He nodded. “All right. I’ll be there soon.”

Iris and Mizuki were playing some game together, laughing and cheering and teasingly trash talking each other. She gave them the usual _good night, love you, don’t stay up too late_ , then headed back to her room. She pulled open the dresser, took out her nightclothes, and began to maneuver her right arm out of her sweater.

“Let me help you.”

She turned to see him standing there, closing the door behind him, and she smiled. He returned it. He was used to this by now. Grabbing the edge of her sweater, he pulled it up over her head, and she was free. He turned it right side out and set it on her dresser, right where he knew she kept it. 

This was normal now. Ordinary.

She was so, so glad.

She reached up and gave him a quick kiss. He leaned down for another and put his hands on her waist, his fingers just barely skirting beneath the edge of her tank top. It made something flutter in her stomach. 

It was over far too soon for her liking. Just a few seconds later, he pulled back and turned away, then took out his own pajamas and began to unbutton his shirt. She couldn’t help but stare at him as he did. 

He noticed. He smirked. “What, you want to see? Be my guest.”

She laughed softly and glanced away, busying herself with taking off her own shirt. Once she had, she looked back to him. He had moved on - his shirt was off and he had switched to undoing his belt - but he was still turned towards her.

He wasn’t going to make this easy on her, was he? Well, that was fine. She was perfectly willing to embrace those thoughts.

“You know what?” She grinned. “I changed my mind.”

He had just taken off his belt. He set it next to her sweater and looked over at her. “Hmm? About what?”

“I’m not too tired yet after all.” She stepped closer to him and put her hand under his chin. “How about we have some fun tonight?”

His hands found her waist again. This time, they were so warm against her skin. “ _You’re_ asking _me_? Now that’s something that doesn’t happen very often.”

“What can I say? That movie put me in a strange mood.”

He chuckled. “I’m certainly not complaining.”

She pushed herself up and kissed him again. It was longer than before, softer, deeper. His hands trailed up her back, sending shivers down her spine. 

They pulled away, and he lifted her up gently, then set her on the bed. A moment later, he was beside her, reaching for her. She pulled him close and their lips met again.

When they finally parted, he was leaning over her. He looked down at her and smiled. “Well, since this is a rare occasion, I should ask a question I’ve been wanting to for a very long time now.”

She smiled back. “Ask whatever you want.”

The smirk that rose to his face was more than a little mischievous. “What’s your biggest sexual fantasy?”

She blinked. Her chest tightened, and suddenly her cheeks burned. “I… well, I-”

“Anything you want.” He bent down and kissed her ear. His teeth just barely grazed it, and for a moment, she found herself unable to breathe. “Whatever it is, I’ll do it,” he whispered.

She had to force her mouth to work. She laughed awkwardly, glancing away. “Well, I’m… not a very sexual person, Kaname. I haven’t really thought about it.”

“Maybe not consciously.” He pulled back and looked at her. “But even you aren’t immune to those kinds of dreams, are you? What happened in them?”

Dreams… yes, she’d had those kinds of dreams occasionally. They were rare, but they did happen. And there certainly was a similarity between them.

But that connection... well, that was what she was hesitant to tell him.

“I…” She shook her head. “I can’t. It would hurt you too much.”

He raised an eyebrow and grinned. “Kinky.”

“No!” She swatted his arm playfully. He laughed, and for what it was worth, she did too. She sighed. “Not like that. I meant it might hurt you emotionally.”

He frowned. “Explain.”

She glanced away. “Well, almost all of my dreams like… _that_ , for years, had one similarity. Some of them still do. So I guess you could call that similarity my biggest fantasy.”

“What was it?”

She put her hand on his cheek, and ran her thumb over it. “You.”

“Huh?”

“All of _those_ dreams I’ve had, for years now, have been about _you_.”

He blinked. Apparently, he didn’t know how to process that.

“Even during those six years, when I should have let you go, they were always about you.” She murmured. “Even right after you came back, when we were just friends, they were still about you.”

“Hitomi,” he said sternly, leaning over her again, and his voice was so low it made her breath catch. “Do you have _any idea_ how hot that is?”

She shook her head. “It’s not! It’s really bad. I couldn’t move on. I was stuck in the past. And when we were still just friends, it-”

“ _Hitomi_ ,” he repeated, but this time he was grinning. “That doesn’t hurt me at all.”

She should have explained what she really meant. She should have gotten to the point. But that look on his face made her want to forget all that. 

So, at least for a moment, she let herself. She put her fingers under his chin and drew him close and kissed him. When she let him go and pulled away, she was grinning back. “Then would you like to hear about them?”

There was a glint in his eye. “Absolutely.”

“Hmm.” She closed her eyes and tried to recall the details. She’d been ashamed of most of those dreams. Finally being able to share them was like a weight off her chest. “Well, once I dreamed I had gone to visit you, and then, halfway through, all the guards had to leave. Once they did, your personality changed completely, and it was like you were back. And you kissed me.”

“Mmm. And then?”

“And then…” She opened her eyes and smiled softly. “Well, you can guess what happened next.”

“Please, tell me.”

She thought for a moment, carefully choosing her words. “We made up for all our lost time. Right there in that room.”

“And then what?” His grin was back.

She sighed. “And then I woke up, very much alone.”

The grin faded, but he didn’t dwell on that. “Do you remember anything specific we did in it?”

She shook her head. “No, not really.” It was only a partial truth. “A lot of them were like that, actually. I’d find you in some random setting, we’d go someplace alone, and… then we would do it. I always felt guilty after those, for not bringing you back to Iris.”

He smiled softly. “You’re too kind. Even in your fantasies, you put her first.”

She hummed. “No, I didn’t, and that was the problem. Well, I did in one of them. I rather liked that one.”

“Oh?”

It was her biggest guilty pleasure of a dream. She would be lying if she said she hadn’t found herself thinking about it time and time again. “I found you out walking around. You needed to hide from the police, and we almost got caught, but we managed to get away. So I brought you back here.” She smiled. “Iris was so happy. We hugged and laughed and made dinner together. Again, the police almost found you, but you hid. And then…” She put her hand on his arm. “I took you to bed. And this time, I was the one initiating.”

“Mmm.” He smiled. “Sounds kind of like right now.”

She chuckled. “A little.”

His fingers trailed up her stomach. “Then how about I make your dream come true?”

“Not with the police chasing you down, I hope.”

He laughed. “No. We won’t have to worry about that.”

He leaned down and kissed her, and she cherished the feeling, savoring the way he tasted. They were safe, really safe - no more cops, no more yakuza, no more serial killers. She was more than willing to sacrifice that part of her dream.

But there was something else that had made them so wonderful at the time, a part that now made her words stick in her throat. A part she’d been trying to ignore for so long. It had been so important in that dream, in all her dreams, and yet now it just made her uncomfortable.

That it wasn’t quite him. That it was, but that even after all this time, she couldn’t quite see it as _him_.

When they parted, she put her hand on his chest with a sigh. “Actually, Kaname, there was… one more thing.”

“What is it?”

“I… thought of you as ‘Falco’ for so long. In my dreams, you were always ‘Falco’.” She glanced down. “And I… I know it was you. I know it’s always been you. I know you’re the same person, just changed. I know that. And I love you for who you are now, not who you were then. But some part of me is still caught up in the past. Some part of me can’t reconcile him to you.”

His next words were measured. “So what would you like me to do?”

She took a deep breath. “I want you to help me do that. I need you to help me see you as the one I always dreamed about.”

He caught her implication. “...You want to call me Falco.”

“I don’t necessarily _want_ to, but… it was like that in my dreams. I think it would be the easiest way. This is why I said it would hurt you.”

His face fell, and he went quiet. He didn’t say a word.

Ugh, how stupid of her - stupid and selfish and insensitive. It had only hurt him, and she had known it would, but she had said it anyways. Why had she done that? She should have kept that to herself. It was good to be honest, but too much honesty was painful, and she had been far too honest.

She put her hand on his cheek, and his eye flicked to hers. She shook her head. “N-Never mind, I shouldn’t have asked. Just ignore that. It’s okay.”

After a long moment, he put his own hand on top of hers on his cheek. His thumb brushed the back of her hand. “No. Do it.”

“No, Kaname, really, it’s fine.” She shook her head again. “That was cruel of me. I’m sorry.”

But despite her words, he only smiled. “No. I said I’d do whatever it was, didn’t I?”

“Kaname-”

“Hitomi.” He squeezed her hand. “I _want_ you to reconcile us.”

She opened her mouth to say something, but closed it, and sighed. “Are… Are you sure?”

“Yes.” He nodded. “I may have changed, but that was me, and I fully accept that. We’re one and the same. But there’s some part of me that feels like we aren’t. Like ‘Falco’ was only a criminal, not a living, breathing person, not _me_. But you know better than anyone that’s not true.” He looked straight into her eyes. “So remind me of who I am.”

She met his gaze. Slowly, she took a breath. “Then, if you’re sure… help me eradicate this feeling.”

“For you? Anything. Anything to make your dream a reality.”

Anything, huh? Well, there _had_ been one more thing...

He brought their hands away from his face and bent down to kiss her again, but she stopped him. He blinked in surprise. She smiled apologetically. “If I may be selfish… can I ask one last thing? It wasn’t from this dream specifically, but...”

He nodded. “Anything.”

She looked down. “My biggest regret was never saying I loved you. So in my dreams, I would fix that. And I always wanted to hear you-”

“I love you.”

He blurted out the words before she could finish, and her heart leapt. It was selfish, she knew, but in that moment it was nothing short of cathartic. “Please,” she whispered. “Tell me how much.”

“So much. You saved me, Hitomi. I can’t imagine my life without you. I would sacrifice anything for you.”

“You did. You gave up your body. You gave up everything.”

He squeezed her hand. “Because I loved you.”

“And I love you, Kaname.” She squeezed back.

He gently shook his head. “Your dream, remember?”

“Right.” She swallowed. For some reason, her mouth didn’t want to move, but she forced it to. “F… Falco.”

It had been so long since she’d spoken that name. It felt strange and foreign on her lips, as if she were calling him by someone else’s name. Even though he looked like him, even though he was him, something about it didn’t belong to him.

But then his face softened into a smile, _Falco’s_ smile, and she forgot how to breathe.

“That’s right.”

_Falco._

He shifted, and then he was on top of her, and she kissed him with all she had.

For six years, she’d called him that. She’d thought of him that way for even longer. The familiarity was still there. Those times came flooding back to her - His smile and Iris’s, the okonomiyaki war, showing him that drawing. Lying in bed with him, his skin warm under her fingers and his name on her lips, lost in the feel of his tongue on her own. Just like this.

_Hitomi, do you want to live together? The three of us?_

The promise she’d held him to. The promise he’d left.

Without warning, his hand slipped beneath her bra, and she gasped, breaking their kiss. “Falco!”

This time, it was completely involuntary.

For a moment, she only stared at him. But he wasn’t hurt. He just grinned slyly and stretched out his fingers, feeling her, teasing her. Holding a breath, she lifted her arm above her. He lifted the other for her, and in one quick motion, pulled her bra over her head.

She kissed him. His hands were all over her, and hers moved up to his head. She found his ponytail, and pulled it out, and his hair fell to his shoulders. Her fingers twisted into it.

_Falco. Falco._

He’d been taken from her, but still, even then, she’d gone to see him. Imagined if he was back.

And now he was.

He’d kept his promise.

He looked the same, smelled the same, felt the same, tasted the same. He was Kaname, _her_ Kaname, but he was her Falco, too.

Her same, wonderful Falco.

She was kissing _Falco._

She’d known that, in the same way she’d known he had always been him, but it had never hit her this definitively before. Not really. Not like this. It was as if all the air had left her body at once, and she had to break the kiss to breathe.

“Falco,” she whispered. “Kaname. I love you.”

“I love you too, Hitomi,” he murmured. “I always did. I loved you as Falco, and I love you now.”

She kissed him again, and tugged down his waistband. He kicked off his pants, and a few moments later, hers were gone too.

She wrapped her legs around his waist. He groaned. He broke the kiss and trailed his mouth down her neck, her collar, her chest - there he lingered, and she bit her lip. Her arm curled around him, fingers tightening in his hair.

Their images overlapped in her mind. Kaname. Falco.

Kaname.

Falco.

His fingers fiddled with the edge of her underwear, and he looked up at her. “Hitomi. I love you so, so much.”

Falco loved her. Kaname loved her.

And she loved him.

“I love you, Falco.”

Her voice was choked. She’d been wanting to say those words for so long. So, so long.

And when he smiled, soft and gentle and so deeply knowing, she knew he’d already heard her say them so many times before.

The differences between them wavered and disappeared, their images coalescing into one and yet vanishing altogether, blending into the man before her. The man who fit them both.

Who she _loved._

Who loved _her._

It was him. It was always him.

She had to crane her neck to reach his ear, but she did, and kissed it, her teeth grazing the edge. “Kaname,” she whispered into his ear. “I love you. It’s all _you._ It’s always been you.”

And he - not just Falco, not just Kaname, but both of them, all of him, _him_ \- he pulled down her underwear, and then his were off too, and she didn’t hold herself back in the slightest.

She would lay down everything for him. He would do the same for her. And they both had. 

That night, once again, he was hers. He always would be.

And when they were done, when they were left spent and clinging weakly to each other in a breathless mess, she was more sure of that than ever.

He put his arm around her. “How was that? Good enough?”

“Of course.” She pressed her forehead to his. “And I’m sorry for bringing up old wounds. I know you hate that.”

He shook his head, slowly, and smiled. “Don’t worry about it. This time it wasn’t so bad. You know, when you call me that, I almost like it.”

She smiled back, and he kissed her, long and slow. Her heart had never been lighter.

“So,” he murmured, pulling away. “Did I make your dream come true?”

She laughed softly. “Better than.”

“Really?”

“Yes. Because this time it won’t end.” She put her hand on his cheek. “When I wake up you’ll be beside me, too.”

He pulled her closer and kissed her again, and she let herself be lost in him.

And when morning finally came, sure enough, he was still there.

**Author's Note:**

> Can't believe this fandom starved me of Datomi content so much I wrote smut. I'm supposed to be the angst writer here if this gave you feelings I do not apologize


End file.
